I almost rage quit WoW last night. No joke. I think the main issue is that I am heroic'd out. I will explain. I just spent 50 frost emblems. Now these are gained from high end raids (new stuff) a DAILY heroic will get you 2, and a WEEKLY raid will get you 5. You get some of the best gear with them. I bought my tanking cloak, and the emblem count flipped over to zero.
My heart sunk a little. As our relatively new guild is only doing some Ulduar 10 to get to know each other it takes me a while to build up that badge number. I can understand that. This isn't a welfare epic plea. This is just stating that if I have to run one more fucking 5 man I am going to gouge my eyes out with a spoon.
Being a tank makes running these 5 mans even more difficult. If guild members are not on you subject yourself to the world of PUG's. While for the most part they are ok some nights I just do not have it in me.
Case in point was last night. Buddy of mine got his battered hilt drop. So we have to work on that quest. The battered hilt is a quest starter for one of the best NON RAIDING weapons in the game but you have to do a quest to get it. I like that this is in the game now. However it also means tanking and grouping up for some annoying instances. So last night into Heroic Pit of Saron we go and I was stressed for time. I really did NOT want to run the whole thing. I wanted to get in, get my friend his ore, kill the first boss and jet. I had stuff to do and major woman agro.
Well we couldn't fill all the slots with guildies so we had to PUG a DPS member. Of course this requires explaining to this guy that if he goes we are only here to do the quest for the weapon and many of us may have to bail. I feel bad about this because it sucks to go and not finish and instance and get locked out. On the flip side I should have not PUG'd anyone and just 4 manned it.
So off we go and I admit I do a shitty job tanking. My head is just NOT in it and yet we push on. Two bosses down and people start bailing and I'm getting shouted at over my shoulder. Then it just clicks and I snap. I run into the gauntlet and the healer goes down and we wipe. People come back and start blaming others and the whole thing disintegrates into an e-shouting match. My nerves are frayed and I just say: "LOOK. I need to log, I DO NOT FEEL LIKE FINISHING THIS" and I disconnect and log out. There are some nights when I just CANNOT handle people, emo MMO players, or trudging through yet another damn heroic dungeon.
Sometimes you have to take a step back and wonder why you are playing the game you are playing. I put so much effort into WoW that I think I burn myself out. When that happens I have to step back and not log in for a few days. There is a lot of pressure on me to do so since I am primarily the tank on the most. No one else wants to do it. They fear it. If I do not log in the cries of no guild grouping start and it escalates from there.
Look I have been playing this game for 5 years. Not solid all the way through I have taken some breaks but I have raided as DPS, Healing and Tanking and all 3 of my 80's are geared for ICC 10. There are times when I just have to step back and think that maybe just maybe I play too much yeah? That cannot be good for anyone. However new people that log in and are hitting level 80 and want to "go go go" just do not understand that. I feel like that old grizzled Roman officer in the armor that is dented and rusted but he keeps on going.
Only I don't have wine and wenches. I think everyone should have wine and wenches.